I've moved around a bunch in my life.
Into my adult life, I kept moving some more, I guess there was a peace of mind found by restarting and continually developing, a big part was no one would see me, the real me. I could keep all my broken little pieces scattered about the moving boxes, and be that enigma that floats in and out. It was easy, I didn't have to face my traumas.
That is not a healthy way to deal with anything and in 2018 I noticed that. I wanted something more stable. I found a house in Sandy Utah with a rando from the internet and I moved in. Telling myself that It was just a home base for a while, and it was. It was the perfect crash pad for me to travel around, explore, and build my clientele list.
Then 2019 came and knocked me on my ass, but it also gave me a glimpse of what having a home would be like. I felt a sense of comfort and security, like this comfortable blanket that would protect me from everything around me. It was my very first moment where I realized I wanted that stability, that I wanted a home.
It's been a long time coming getting to this place, and maybe you're here, or maybe you're not, either way, how do you create ANYWHERE you live into a home?
Here are my thoughts.
1) Let Go.
I had to finally release my ideals where it came to all of the stuff surrounding having a home. Maybe it didn't mean with the love of my life, maybe it didn't mean with my dream clients, maybe it didn't mean the place that I always thought it would be? Or maybe, life was directing me into something better. But I had to take a deep breath, accept that I was the only one in charge of my path, and let go of everything I thought it was going to be. I wish I could tell you that this part was easy and quick. It's not, nor has it been. It's been heartbreaking, and honestly something I never ever want to feel again. You can't force people to make a home with you, and home just show up because you want it to be there. You need to let go all of your preconceived notions about what your home should be, and allow the universe to show you what it needs to be.
2) Gratitude.
In the midst of chaos, it's so easy to be consumed by distractions, and worries. Anxiety easily takes over and will quickly move your mind to a place of worrisome and stress rather than present happiness. Take a moment each day to think about the small things in life you have to be thankful for. Sometimes all you have is opening your eyes, other times it's less pain, then sometimes its supportive best friends. Each day is different, and each day should have gratitude, and the more you practice that principle the more your days will be filled with gratitude. Whether you hate where you live, or you love it, find something in your space to be grateful for. There are things if you look hard enough. There's no bad place just a bad attitude.
3) Celebrate Milestones
I've always been a birthday celebrator. Birthdays are a huge milestone to me, not everyone gets as many as we do, so we might as well celebrate it. That being said there are other milestones to also celebrate. Whether it's the house stayed clean for an entire day, or you've been living in the same place for 2 years. Celebrate the small victories in business, the successes in the day. You can even celebrate the fact that your fav TV show is coming back on. Milestones in life should be celebrated! I will always say this. The energy it brings to your living space is game-changing. I was staying in this place once that was maybe the coldest I've ever been in my life, and you know what I celebrated? I celebrated people, warm drinks, and great games of chess. I've lived in cities I've loved, and I've lived in places I've absolutely not liked, but there is ALWAYS things to celebrate about them. Find them, it's part of the adventure!
4) People, Not Places
I used to live in a bubble where I just wanted to see the world, travel the entire United States and I didn't care if I did it alone or with anyone. I felt like I didn't need anyone, and while I didn't want anyone, it turns out I needed everyone. People make places. Almost every memory I have in a place is surrounded by people, and the energy they brought to the experience. When I was stuck at a gas station and some southern guys helped my change my fuel pump. Or the time I was drinking in a parking lot and some girls came to join because it looked like fun. There were times friends came from Canada to surprise me, and there were times I felt entirely lonely. People make the place, the place doesn't make the people. When you find a place, make sure you find quality people as well, because sooner or later you start to feel at home, and you realize that feeling shows up when certain people walk in the room, and it's not about the room itself.
I sit here thinking of all the times over the last 2 years I've felt at home. The people who have brought the home feeling to me, and the comfort it's showed up when a plane lands on the runway. I sit here thinking that home is less than a place, a client, a dream job, or even a perfect location. Home is a magical feeling you get when you insert love wherever you are.
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